


The evil, horrible, almost certainly deadly, possibly man-eating, pet

by Fox_the_Hermit



Category: Death Note
Genre: Awful pet, Be Careful What You Wish For, Gen, Pet, Poisonous Snake, snake - Freeform, terrifying pet
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-08
Updated: 2015-12-08
Packaged: 2018-05-05 17:25:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,269
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5384135
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fox_the_Hermit/pseuds/Fox_the_Hermit
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>At Light's suggestion, L retrieves his pet from England, to the collective horror of the others when they meet it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Introduction

 

_Two Days Ago:_

_"L, you should really get yourself a pet to distract you from work. It's unhealthy to spend over a hundred hours in front of a computer without a proper break."_

_"I already have one, Light."_

_"I have never seen it! Where is it? What is it?" exclaimed Matsuda._

_"I did not bring it as I assumed you would not be able to work with her in the room."_

_"None of us would mind it, whatever it is."_

_"Well, if you are quite sure…"_

 

 

Present Day:

Light, his father and the other members of the Kira Investigation Team were in the elevator discussing what type of pet L might have, as they had forgotten to ask L, and he had not volunteered the information, apart from one quiet mutter. It was due to arrive today, all the way from England.

"I bet it's a cat. Cats are really picky about people, lazy, nocturnal and hate people, and L is a perfect match."

"Could it be a dog?"

"A dog is definitely very unlikely. They are really distracting, need lots of walk and attention, and are very loud.»

"I think it’s a spider or a really loud parrot. Or a really ridiculous looking fish in an aquarium. Why would he think a cat or dog would unnerve us?"

The elevator doors opened and they went inside the room. There was no sign of the pet. No cage, no toys, nothing. Everything looked just like it had before. The group proceeded to go to their respective work places, ready to begin working.

There was no sign of L, either, and a very noticeable lack of the usual piles of plates. Now, instead of the dozen or so plates, there was only one or two, and a dish full of fruit. It was also quite a bit warmer in the room than usual, but not too warm.

"Where do you think L is?» asked Matsuda.

"Right here." L's voice came from the elevator and staircase. The group turned around as one. They saw that L was wearing something that resembled a long, very thick, green-black scarf, loosely looped several times around his neck.

"Where is your pet?" inquired Light, making a very quick hand gesture at the now close-by detective.

This action caused the 'scarf' to suddenly rear a head, and hiss, angrily. The head also had a large hood, and in the mouth, four long, thin white fangs could be easily seen.

Loud, girly screaming ensued for the next few minutes, as everyone ran as far away from L as they could, while staying in the room, since going out would require going really close to L.

"Is that a King Cobra?" Light stuttered from his perch on his chair.

"Yes. Her name is Arianna." L replied, a hint of amusement in his voice, as Matsuda shook like a leaf in a strong wind on his own chair.

"Why did you not tell us it was a snake? And a poisonous one, at that." Light said, shaking slightly.

"I think I told you once, a week or so ago?"

"I thought you were joking!"

"I don't joke."

 

* * *

 

And so the terrorisation of the team began.

They would try to sit down on a chair, only to find it already occupied by something from a horror movie about man-eating pythons. Leaving a chair, after sitting down for a long while, to return later, would make this addition to the chair almost certain.

Two unblinking, yellow-green eyes would stare at them from L's chair, whenever they made a sudden movement.

Loud voices provoked a hiss, and the occasional showing of very deadly fangs.

They would sometimes sit down to relax for a bit on the couch, only to freeze in terror when something slithered on to the back of the couch, or even worse, across their legs.

Worse than all of that, however, would be when the snake was with its owner. He would absently stroke its triangular head or feed it berries or apple slices.

When Light asked why the snake ate fruit, L had explained that he had liberated the serpent from an experimentation lab, where they were trying to mutate the snake to make it much more toxic and aggressive. The only results were that the snake became a very poisonous, non-aggressive herbivore and got a considerably longer life span.

However, despite L's claims about it being a peaceful herbivore, the team was terrified that the snake would decide it wanted to snack on a piece of a human. Or slither into their briefcase, come home with them and eat their children. It was certainly big enough, with it being almost four and a half meters long.

 

 

 

 

_Alternate chapter title: "New Arrival: You May Proceed With The Terrorisation"_


	2. The Fridge Horror

As Light opened the fridge to get a snack (L's habits were starting to rub off on him), he froze. His heart started beating so fast that it was difficult to tell apart the separate beats. He considered running away, but he knew he would be attacked - sudden movements were bad, very bad, according to what he had read on the Internet, his only hope and salvation. So, he had to close the fridge - it was the only option to escape with his life.

Slamming the fridge door, Light sprinted away from the fridge as fast as possible, trying to get as far away from it as possible. Panting, Light entered the work room, where the entire team was looking at him, wondering why he was running.

Light walked over to L. "Get rid of it."

"No, you said it won't bother you."

"It is bothering me NOW."

"What happened?" Matsuda interrupted the conversation with a smile on his face. Light threw him an irritated glare.

At first, the entire team except Light was afraid of Arianna. However, when Matsuda discovered that the snake was really, really fond of mangoes... He quickly convinced everyone that the snake was a wonderful, innocent, cute creature. Nowadays, it was common to see Matsuda playing with the frankly huge and terrifying King Cobra as though it was a harmless puppy and throwing her bits of fruit to catch. And when he found out that she liked to sort-of-dance to music... Well, they became best friends.

Light, however, had become convinced that the creature had originated in hell.

Arianna would curl around his seat, slide over his feet, steal his food, put herself in a place where Light would not expect to see her and hiss threateningly at him when he looked at her, making years of his life run away screaming with terror, and his nerves resign due to the job of staying strong being too scary.

She would hide in his things, sometimes steal them, and worst of all, she seemed to be aware of Ryuk because she had once bitten the surprised shinigami, pretended to be about to attack him another time, and almost constantly watched him.

Light was convinced the snake knew he was Kira and was only waiting for an opportunity to kill and eat him, and then do the same to Ryuk. It could read, for heaven's sake! At least, he was sure it could. He had once seen L read a book, and the snake was looking over his shoulder.

Hearing a familiar hiss, Light froze. How could the snake have already gotten here? He was sure he closed the fridge properly. _Right. It is time to acquire a dozen mongooses. (Mongeese?)_

 

Alternate Chapter Title:  _What do you call a dozen mongooses, and where can I get them?_


End file.
